My ideal job
When I began to look for my ideal job, I was driven by the fact that I could not bare it any longer to be in a job that was frustrating me. I was lost and very unsatisfied, so I wanted to change and be more fulfilled.
I wanted a job that would put a smile on my face when I woke up and one where I would be excited to begin everyday. I would be excited to do everything I like and be frustrated only because I wouldn’t have enough time in a day to enjoy my passions.
I was looking for an ideal job; a job that would fit me and would allow me to make a difference.
I didn’t know how to choose because I didn’t know who I was. What was my perfect career/job? What job would fit who I am?
The big puzzle
Discovering myself was like assembling a big puzzle. The small pieces of the puzzle are all the aspects of myself that I didn’t know and what I’ve since discovered during my self development journey. Each piece was hidden in me. I was collecting them through my self discovery day after day, little by little.
Once that puzzle assembled, I finally see who I am. Here are the pieces of puzzle I gathered in a chronological order. You can follow my self-discovery how I experienced it 🙂
Ça fait un an que je me suis rendu compte que je souhaitais changer de carrière. En quête d’inspiration, j’ai commencé par lire des livres et des blogs de développement personnel. Je voulais rencontrer des personnes qui étaient dans la même situation que moi pour en discuter. Je recherchais des témoignages de bloggeurs qui auraient expliqué comment ils ont procédé. Je n’ai trouvé aucun blog qui m’ait inspiré ou intéressé sur ce thème.
Le but de ce blog est de retracer mes progrès dans mon développement personnel et discuter de ce que j’ai appris dans les livres, les blogs et de ma propre expérience.
Nom du blog
J’ai nommé le blog « Do What you love » car ça fait référence à une citation populaire qui me tient à coeur. Pendant trop longtemps, j’ai pris des décisions pour les mauvaises raisons. J’ai choisi ma carrière parce que j’avais des facilités, parce que mon université était prestigieuse, parce je pouvais avoir un bon salaire, parce que le marché du travail en informatique était florissant etc. La bonne raison aurait été de faire ce que j’aime, ce qui m’intéresse et ce qui me passionne.
Looking for who I am
For a long time, I’ve been unsatisfied with my job. That frustration grew deeper and stronger, I was just living my frustration in many aspects of my life. I wanted to change and be more fulfilled by finding my perfect job/career, a job that would fit me and ultimately “make my passion my job”.
The questions behind those goals are:
• What is my perfect career/job ?
• What would be a job that would fit to who I am ?
• How can I make my passions my job ?
• What are my passions?
• What are my dreams?
• What are my strengths/weaknesses?
• What do I want?
• Who am I ?
I didn’t know any of the answers. I had to know myself better to find them.
It turns out that not only I didn’t know what my perfect job was but I didn’t know who I was. I didn’t know my strength/my weakness and my dreams. I was surprised to understand I was ignoring myself. I was a stranger to myself. I felt empty not knowing who this person in the mirror was. I’ve spent my whole life along with myself. I realize I didn’t have a clue about who I truly was. I’ve never taken time to step back from myself to have a broader view and analyze. I didn’t have any clarity on myself and my own life.
Other people’s purpose
For many years, I was only caught in the pursuit of goals that was set for me : I must graduate from a great university, I must find a well paid job. The recipe for happiness seemed simple to me : more money, fun friends, big house, good salary, loving spouse, supporting family….I kinda achieved the recipe for happiness but I wasn’t happy as I expected. It wasn’t working for me. I wanted to be fulfilled and more than that I was looking for meaning in my life.
Before when I was wondering what my passions or interests were, the only answers that popped in my mind were shopping, watching TV, going out with people, going to restaurants… but isn’t it what everybody does casually to socialize or during their spare time. In the end, I only had spare time… I was feeling frustrated and empty.
When I became more conscious that I wanted to change my career, I realized that even out of my work I was not enjoying my life. My problem was deeper than just about my career. I thought that I was supposed to be having fun outside of my work. I wasted so much energy on disliking my work that I was left with no energy to enjoy my life outside of my work.
Another reason which explains why I had no passions, is that I had a very strict and close minded education. For my parents, the goal in life is to earn money, live comfortably and follow Chinese traditions. They never taught me to dream or to enjoy my life. As a consequence of such education, I’ve never allowed myself to experience much outside of the boundaries of my education.
I’ve heard people saying “you know if you have passions or not. If you had any passions, you would be aware of it.” I couldn’t conceive that I was a passionless person. I am such a passionate person with my husband, my friends, when I speak and simply when I go through my everyday life. Sometimes my feelings and my emotions are so strong and are rushing in me. I am sure I have passions. But what are they?
I have trouble to talk about my career change with my friends and people around me. I was worried that they wouldn’t understand or worse they would mock me. What? You want to change your career? You graduated from a great school, you are in a great company, and you have a decent salary… Here are all the voices hunting my head. I was really careful to tell what I was going through to the right person and the right moment. This matter is very important to me and I really don’t want people to make a joke out of it. I don’t want to have to explain myself for hours. According to all the kind of reaction I got, I classified people in following groups:
Type 1: People who don’t understand at all
They are completely closed to the possibility to have a passionate job or other way of living. They think that life is about:
• Having money,
• Having children,
• Having few days of vacations,
• Working to have money,
• Working for 9 to 5,
• Experiencing your passions/interests only out of your job,
Those people think that life is like that and you can’t do anything about it. I would only get sad and waste my time to think otherwise. The faster I would go back to my right mind, the less painful it would be. They would argue with me for hours that I’m wrong and I can’t make my passions to be my job. They think that if you make your passion your work, it would get boring and daunting as it is for any job.
Type 2: People who pretend to understand
Those would pretend to understand but at the same time say that it’s not for them. My dream to make my passions to be my job resonates in them but they are limiting themselves so much that they directly find excuses. They want to feel free to dream and to pursue a passionate life.